No one is ever online when I want them to be anymore. Makes me sad, plain sad!

Oh, another summer comes and goes. This summer, as a whole wasn't the best, but there were certainly some memorable moments/events. During this past winter, all I could think was how summer was going to be amazing, and that it would bring some life into my life. Really though, I'm the only person who can make that happen. This much I realize now. School starts for me on the 8th. I can't wait. Last year (fingers crossed) in a community college. Finally, I think I've found what I truly want to do, ironically its what I was thinking about 5 years ago, back in high school. Nothing's ever certain, especially with me being the finicky person that I am. How can anyone really know what they want to do? I wish I could experience a plethora of careers, or just hit the lottery and do whatever the hell I please. But I don't play the lottery, so there's no chance of that happening.

Ending this now before I really start to ramble.

There's a corner of your heart just for me.
Something's got me on the corner, and I
am whimpering. Somewhere deep inside
your coat, I got my knuckles bruised by a
lady in black.Take me home with you
tonight. We'll touch till' it feels right, where
nothing seems to turn out right. I'm still
holding on to all your words, but you just
whisper what you said. One last time.
I could have sworn I heard you say that you
are mine. I never said that it was mine. I
was just holding it. Someone elses boy,
though your life has been short, I hope
you're asking heavens above to forgive all
the damage you've done.Just say you love
me now. Leave me your stardust to
remember you by. The lack of space for the
light-hearted in the boom that beats our
drum Loose ends tangle down. And then
take flight.

George&Izzie mix

( there's a corner of your heart for me. ) 

My night manager basically offered a full-time position to me the other day. He said I was the best, and I deserved it more than anyone else currently. I turned him down, just because I don't want to get stuck at a grocery store for the rest of my life (plus I'm looking for a new job) =P but it was nice to see my hard work wasn't going unnoticed.

In other news:
-I need to register for classes! I think I better do that soon.
-Its crazy to think its already July. This summer has been... wet. I've never experienced so much rain in my life. Some days I hate it, and some days it ends up being just what I was hoping for.
-I get  paid vacation in august, and I want to take a little trip. Anyone have a free couch? ;) Really though, maybe just a road trip. We'll see.
-I made a stupid video with my brother's today. Maybe I'll share it when its on youtube.

My little brother is graduating high school tonight. Suddenly I feel old.

Stole this from m'Melia

I want you to ask me something you think you should know about me, something that should be obvious, but you have no idea about, or something you've always been curious about but have never asked, or something completely silly that you'd like me to answer for kicks. No limits on the range of questions, either; ask me anything you want to know about, whether it's a fannish opinion or a question about a fic of mine or trivia about my real life or my thoughts on events in the offline world. You may ask as many questions as you'd like. GO.

My Sims 3 game arrived in the post today, much to my excitement. I'll never understand how a video game like this, where the player is essentially just keeping their person alive could be so life-sucking! All Sims players know what I'm talking about. You're playing the game, look up and all of a sudden 5 hours have passed. Oh, its terrible folks. So far there are parts I am happy with and parts I am not. I made some Brian/Justin sims... those should be a blast.

I'm so pissed off right now. My little brother got his girlfriend kicked out of her house. He told me that he snuck her out. What an idiot. Well, now she's been staying with us for the past 3 days or so. My brother had to lie to my parents about why she got kicked out. Today his girlfriend's mother called my mom and said she wanted her daughter back. She said how her daughter is in counseling and has done this sort of thing with other boyfriends. She's apparently a "problem child." Now my mother and Tasha's (my brother's gf) mother are thinking that she's been lying to my brother about everything that's been going on at home.

Today I wake up and I do my morning routine, shower, cereal, bad tv... I'm enjoying my bowl of fruit loops and I hear someone walk into the kitchen. Its my brother. Apparently they were skipping their study hall together. The thing about that is when you go to school for 11, it doesn't exactly count as a full day. I asked my mom if she knew he was going in later than usual today and she had no idea. She confronted him via text message and now he's pissed off at me. Its only when he's with a girl that he does idiotic things and expects me to just watch and not say a word. I don't mind covering for him when it really matters. I covered for him when he lied to our parents about why Tasha got kicked out. But what the fuck ever its ridiculous.

Anyway, we're bringing Tasha home today... and I'm not supposed to tell her or my brother. Otherwise they might take off, which would obviously not be good at all.

+I can't believe tomorrow is Friday. This week has flown by. Its flown by much faster than I wish it had. Monday is my sign presentation, and I only settled on a song this past Monday. Granted, its an easy song... it's still nerve wracking. Hopefully my practice will pay off.

+My kitty, Bette Davis seems angry at me today and I can't seem to fathom why. Why, Bette Davis, Why?

+Tonight I went out to dinner with a friend I hadn't seen in a few months. I was expecting awkwardness, but there was none. Its nice when two people can pick up where they left off.

+This Sunday I'm getting a paino! A freaking piano! I'm so excited. I know it'll be frustrating trying to learn how to play, considering I have Charlie Brown hands and all, but I really want to learn.

And that's all the randomness for now.

I finally filter my friend's page... which took all of 3 seconds. LOL. So now, I will be a more active friend. <3

As always, I miss you. <3 I selfishly wish that your life didn't keep you so busy, cause I like having you around. Anywho, I hope this birthday will be a memorable one for you. I love you bunches.

Lately it seems as though my life outside of work and school has been taken over by tv on dvd. If I'm not watching Felicity or Six Feet Under than I'm watching The OC or Dawson's Creek or even QAF which I just started rewatching yesterday. I think its time for me to put down the boxsets and venture out into the world for an excursion.

On a less pop culture-ish note, there is something I've been dying to talk to someone about but I guess I'm just not ready to yet. So for now, I'll keep it to myself. Who knows, maybe it'll blow over and be nothing worth discussing at all.

I'm kind of bored with this place right now. There is absolutely no urge to go through my friends page or anything. :( Sorry flist.

I think about you all the time.

My father replaced the lights in the bathroom. In our house, we use energy saving bulbs nearly everywhere. Not in our bathroom anymore. It was odd taking a shower this morning. The bright lights made me feel as if I were showering in one of those faux bathroom displays in Home Depot. Oooh, Home Depot should totally hire people to pretend to use their displays. I'll just let you imagine that on your own.

P.S. Lost is on tonight! Can't wait for all the drama ;) 

My sister really pissed me off... more like offended me today. Every week I've been going over to her place on Thursday nights. We have this routine, anywho... she called me today to see if I was going to be able to come over. I reminded her that I couldn't because my mother's surgery, which is Friday. (Usually we just veg out together on Fridays) She basically shrugged it off and actually asked me if I was going to the hospital. Which was something we'd already discussed. I know my mom is not her mother, but it would be nice to have some empathy. Maybe I'm asking for too much. Needless to say that was not good for my current state of PMS which was on high alert. (this had be bawling my eyes out this morning http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__UHSZHJ9LA) Thanks to Cla for making me smile just minutes later though. <3 I think you lie to me, Cla but its okay. LOL.

Recently I've begun reconnecting with an old friend. Several months back we had a falling out, and haven't really spoken since. I find myself having trepidations over the events that caused said falling out, but it is nice to have her back in my life... even if its just a little bit.  A couple nights ago I had this dream about the group of friends I left high school with. I wasn't able to talk to them though, it was like I was watching them from a distance. That's sort of what its like now. No one talks to one another now. Everything suddenly became so petty. It was as if it took leaving the drama of high school for us to find it.

What happened to us?  Ya know? I don’t know who I am anymore.  Or how I got here.I miss who I used to be.
And real friends. Ya know, the kind of friendships we used to believe in.  I miss that.

As some of you know, my mother and my cousin have Multiple Sclerosis. Every year we participate in the MS Walk. This year my mother will be recovering from her surgery so she won't be able to walk. Lucky wench ;) ... anyway if you'd like to donate to the cause, via me, please do.
secure3.convio.net/nmss/site/Donation2<--- click there.

I just shamelessly want to raise $100 so I can get a t-shirt this year... oh and for the good of the people of course.

This title is irrelevant to the contents of the post below. :)

+Over the past few years, I've come to notice that men seem to have problems pronouncing my name. I don't know why, its not like its hard to say. Teachers, bosses, male acquaitances either refer to me as Nikki or Nik. They've both annoyed me severely in real life, I've never introduced myself by either nickname (pun not intended) . Ni-kee-tah. How hard is it to say that? LOL. Its weird though, it doesn't bother me that some/most of my online friends call me Nik.

I just had a run-in with a manager at work and he called me Nikki. I was not a fan so I felt the need to ramble a tad.

+In other news, I am terribly bored with the internet. Any website suggestions to cure boredom? Yes, I consider my boredom with the web news.

+ This weekend I watched the movie Once. It was different, but in a good way. I loved the simplicity of it all (with the exception of the music <3). It was nice to be wrong in predicting the end of a movie for once. 

That's enough about me for now.

Rambling through my mind word ghosts I seem to find.